SGRoA: Forever Knight S03 E09: Let No Man Tear Asunder

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You know, they don’t say that at weddings anymore. At least not at any I’ve been to, which include strict Catholic at a Cathedral, wishy-washy Catholic at a church that looks like a hotel conference center, and a secular wedding at a zoo. Also, isn’t this episode about organ harvesting? I’m already confused, and I haven’t even pressed “Play”. So let’s get to it!

Some woman’s getting a tattoo, and she’s squirming a lot. Won’t that, like, screw up the tattoo? Also, it’s on her butt, but the artist is just pushing her underwear to the side. I wouldn’t pay for this, is what I’m saying.

The artist runs out of ink and goes to get some more, and some other dude knocks him out with a tire iron. Then he gropes the woman, and then he knocks her out and stuffs her in the back of a panel truck. Continue reading

SGRoA: Forever Knight S03 E08: Trophy Girl

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Snowflakes! Did you miss me? I’ll be honest, I am still tired from last week. I am eagerly anticipating my paycheck at the end of the month, however: Holy Week is lucrative. Let’s get recapping!

There’s a woman in lingerie on a slab, and someone dressed like a doctor starts cutting her clothes off. Side note: She’s wearing a garter belt over her underwear, which means it’s just for sexytimes. If you wear actual stockings for function, you know the belt goes under the knickers, or you’ll never be able to pee.

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SGRoA: Forever Knight S02 E18: The Fix

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Good morning/afternoon/evening to you, Snowflakes! Two recaps, two weeks in a row? I know. It’s like I’ve made this my job or some shit. Let’s recap!

We open during daylight, on a man in a car with a cigar and a piece of paper in his hands. Oh, it’s a photo. He starts drawing on his own face, and then we cut to Nick in Nat’s lab – like, not some lab space she’s rented, or a mini-lab at her house – no, she’s taking vampire blood samples in the crime lab. Continue reading